Trailblazers

I had a very long development planning session with my boss this afternoon. We were trying to scope out what next assignments I need to get to the next level. He finally told me that the reason I didn't get the promotion to senior engineer is because "my technical skills just aren't showing up". He noted that my most recent outstanding success was great, but it's just not technical enough. He said that my skills are there (especially my computer skills which he noted are phenomenal), but I'm missing the technical things that I need to move on. He took me through a series of questions (essentially interviewing me for the job I want in 20 years...global lead of ES&H for our company). One of the questions he asked me was around innovation and forward thinking and how I demonstrated that.

I shared with him my ideas around energy management, and that I think it's something our company needs to focus on to be successful in the future. He said that the project I described is really big and would need to be presented to the CEO, and he's just not sure if I'm ready for that.

He said that he knows I need a move (personally because I hate the schools here and want Shorty in better ones and professionally because I work with two very experienced environmental engineers who are doing everything that needs to be done here), and that I need to "find my niche". He asked me what my dream job is and I told him, "implementing the energy management program for our company."

I realize that part of the problem is that I've essentially worked myself out of a job by utilizing my computer skills. Another part of the problem is the company hasn't had a developing environmental engineer for a generation and he doesn't know what I need to do to grow in my current role. There's no path for me to follow, so I'm essentially going to have to blaze my own trail. That's something I'm no stranger to.

While talking to my ex-boyfriend today (prior to the meeting), I shared my vision with him. He said it sounds like the next move for me is to the corporate headquarters as an environmental manager. He said that maybe I go there and work on the energy management strategy for the company (at least first for the US). I told him that I thought it might fit perfectly. I could do that, learn the other parts of the job as an environmental manager for the company, interact with government officials and gain the contacts and skills I need there, eventually moving up to environmental director for the company, and finishing out my corporate america career as the global lead of ES&H. I could then retire from that position after serving on the board of directors for other companies, and then go on to be a diplomat to other countries (an environmental diplomat, that is) for the US. That's been one of my goals since I was 4 years old (to be a diplomat) when I went to the UN for dinner with my family on New Year's Eve.

The question now becomes, is my company willing to invest in my development and allow me to do those things I think need to be done to protect the environment without following a path they are familiar and comfortable with? Are they willing to help me blaze my own trail to where I want to be?