Talk To Me After You’ve Breastfed

Recently, Gloria (the not so new cost accountant at work) saw me in the hallway and said I need to wear longer pants. She looked at me with a straight face & said, “You’re a tall person, you need to wear long pants.” I’m looking at this girl, all of 25 years old and 5’2” tall and thinking, “Really?!” Why does any of this matter?

So today, I passed by Shelly’s office (one of my Red Hat sister’s) to ask about the date for our upcoming IT audit (Shelly works in IT and lives down the street from me), and showed her the new shoes I bought a couple of weeks ago after seeing Something New. Shelly said, “They’re cute, but you’re pants need to be longer.” I looked at her, looked at my shoe, and looked back up at her and replied, “But if they’re longer, I can’t show off the cute shoes!” She says, “Well, my sister fussed at me last week about the same thing. She said my pants needed to be longer because I was wearing heels, but I’m with you!” So I told Shelly about what Gloria said to which Shelly replied, “Yeah, my sister’s 24. I wanted to tell her, I’ve got kids, I’m not thinking about that!” I said to Shelly, “I know! They say I’m old because I go to bed at 9 PM. I want to tell these young ones, ‘talk to me after you’ve come home on a Thursday from a long day of work after picking up groceries, & spent 45 minutes doing homework with a 5^th grader & trying to explain addition of mixed fractions, while cooking dinner, washing clothes, de-stressing from the long day at work & preparing for an after work business function!’ Yeah, I want these young ones to talk to me after they’ve breastfed!”